Spring is in the air..a time to rejuventate and 'smell the roses.' Align yourself
with the 'real' you, the joyful you. The best way to do this is to continually and deliberately accept and be grateful for all that you are and have. Every day take an inventory of all the wonderful parts of your life: your family, your friends, your job, your health... Sift through what appears bleek at times and find that positive piece to focus on. Don't ever forget that you are a powerful creator and what you give your attention to is what will come to you. A negative focus is simply resistance to getting all you deserve;that you can overcome. So come alive this spring and all year long.
Start with our latest new tool added to our treasure box: Living The Secret Everyday: My Secret Meditation... another way to keep you on track daily living The Secret. See our special introductory combo value above offered by MSM Sales.
Showing posts with label positive thinking. Show all posts
Showing posts with label positive thinking. Show all posts
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Friday, June 20, 2008
Remind Yourself Everyday To Live
Every day I begin my day by speaking and listening to my personal declaration which serves as an important reminder to stay focused. Stored in my memory, I will repeat it through out the day as needed. It goes:
I am a powerful creator.
I can be, do, and have anything I want.
All I have to do is choose those positive thoughts that make me feel good.
I focus on what I want, what I appreciate, what I am thankful for.
My feelings will guide me to create positive thoughts and release all negativity from my mind.
These positive thoughts will bring more positive thoughts, experiences, and people into my life, transforming my desires into my physical reality.
Taken from Living The secret Everyday: My Secret Workbooks
I am a powerful creator.
I can be, do, and have anything I want.
All I have to do is choose those positive thoughts that make me feel good.
I focus on what I want, what I appreciate, what I am thankful for.
My feelings will guide me to create positive thoughts and release all negativity from my mind.
These positive thoughts will bring more positive thoughts, experiences, and people into my life, transforming my desires into my physical reality.
Taken from Living The secret Everyday: My Secret Workbooks
Monday, June 2, 2008
Secret To a Long Healthy Life: Don't Worry
Happy 100th birthday
By Jennifer Elves, Taber Times, Canada
Wednesday, 28 May 2008
Shinyuki Kunimoto is generally a man of small words but when his grandchildren seek words of wisdom from him, he is never short of words.When Kunimoto, who celebrated his 100th birthday in Taber on the weekend, was asked by his granddaughter Kimberly what he would tell his grandchildren so they would have good lives like him, he said, "don't worry about anything."Kimberly says he has always had an easy-going nature.His ability to look at the bright side and not let anything get him down also came out when his grandson Brenden asked him at his birthday celebration in Taber on Saturday, what it felt like to be 100. Kunimoto told his grandson he doesn't feel any different than he did at 90."He said just not thinking about dying helps a lot because if you think about it you're just going to get depressed, so (he said) just to think positively and take one day at a time," says Kimberly.When asked what the secret is to living a long-healthy life, he says he always slept well, walked every day and had passions such as reading, gardening and fishing."He sleeps well, he always has. I always think, 'gee, I wish I could sleep like him.' He goes to bed around 8:30 p.m. and sleeps right through until the morning," says his wife Hisaye.His daughter Eileen adds he has also always been a healthy eater, partly because he wanted to be healthy and because he enjoys foods like vegetables, rice and fish. Kunimoto gardened all the way up until last year and when he was younger, his family members could find him out in the garden every day. When he reflects on his hobbies and looks over at a trophy in his living room he received for fishing, his eyes light up and he makes a point of reminding his wife, daughter and granddaughter how he was named the senior men's champion at the annual fishing derby in 1990 at 82 years old. He also used to have a baseball-cap collection, which he says was "just for fun."Today, he spends a lot of time relaxing and watching T.V. He says having good things to eat, watching T.V. and doing various things keeps him happy and satisfied.Kunimoto, who is originally from Japan, moved to Vancouver at 21, as the economy in Japan was not good. When in Canada, he sent some money back home to help his parents out. He spent most of his working days as a carpenter. He also worked on the oil rigs and did some construction in his earlier days. He built the house him and his wife have been living in for roughly 46 years, and helped to build W.R. Myers high school. From Vancouver, he moved to Princeton B.C., and stayed there for a few years before moving to Picture Butte, which is where he got married through an arranged marriage to Hisaye.The couple has been married for 62 years and has six children, two of whom live in Taber. Eileen and Bruce reside in Taber, their children Jodene and Ross live in Calgary, Dennis lives in Edmonton and Bob resides in Ottawa. He was 38 when they had their first child."He had us late in his life and yet he raised us with patience, kindness, compassion and with integrity," said Eileen, adding he always worked hard and played later.
By Jennifer Elves, Taber Times, Canada
Wednesday, 28 May 2008
Shinyuki Kunimoto is generally a man of small words but when his grandchildren seek words of wisdom from him, he is never short of words.When Kunimoto, who celebrated his 100th birthday in Taber on the weekend, was asked by his granddaughter Kimberly what he would tell his grandchildren so they would have good lives like him, he said, "don't worry about anything."Kimberly says he has always had an easy-going nature.His ability to look at the bright side and not let anything get him down also came out when his grandson Brenden asked him at his birthday celebration in Taber on Saturday, what it felt like to be 100. Kunimoto told his grandson he doesn't feel any different than he did at 90."He said just not thinking about dying helps a lot because if you think about it you're just going to get depressed, so (he said) just to think positively and take one day at a time," says Kimberly.When asked what the secret is to living a long-healthy life, he says he always slept well, walked every day and had passions such as reading, gardening and fishing."He sleeps well, he always has. I always think, 'gee, I wish I could sleep like him.' He goes to bed around 8:30 p.m. and sleeps right through until the morning," says his wife Hisaye.His daughter Eileen adds he has also always been a healthy eater, partly because he wanted to be healthy and because he enjoys foods like vegetables, rice and fish. Kunimoto gardened all the way up until last year and when he was younger, his family members could find him out in the garden every day. When he reflects on his hobbies and looks over at a trophy in his living room he received for fishing, his eyes light up and he makes a point of reminding his wife, daughter and granddaughter how he was named the senior men's champion at the annual fishing derby in 1990 at 82 years old. He also used to have a baseball-cap collection, which he says was "just for fun."Today, he spends a lot of time relaxing and watching T.V. He says having good things to eat, watching T.V. and doing various things keeps him happy and satisfied.Kunimoto, who is originally from Japan, moved to Vancouver at 21, as the economy in Japan was not good. When in Canada, he sent some money back home to help his parents out. He spent most of his working days as a carpenter. He also worked on the oil rigs and did some construction in his earlier days. He built the house him and his wife have been living in for roughly 46 years, and helped to build W.R. Myers high school. From Vancouver, he moved to Princeton B.C., and stayed there for a few years before moving to Picture Butte, which is where he got married through an arranged marriage to Hisaye.The couple has been married for 62 years and has six children, two of whom live in Taber. Eileen and Bruce reside in Taber, their children Jodene and Ross live in Calgary, Dennis lives in Edmonton and Bob resides in Ottawa. He was 38 when they had their first child."He had us late in his life and yet he raised us with patience, kindness, compassion and with integrity," said Eileen, adding he always worked hard and played later.
Sunday, June 1, 2008
Review of The Secret - June, 2008
Book Review: The Secret by Rhonda Byrne
by Tom Butler-Bowdon, CityWire United Kingdom
http://www.citywire.co.uk/personal/-/news/other/content.aspx?ID=304406
by Tom Butler-Bowdon, CityWire United Kingdom
http://www.citywire.co.uk/personal/-/news/other/content.aspx?ID=304406
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Six Secret Qualities of Happy People
Six Secret Qualities of Happy People
by Lisa Brookes Kift, MFT.
If there’s one thing that we all seek - it’s happiness. I’ve never met a person who has told me they didn’t want to be happy, have you? When I do individual therapy, I have the opportunity to sit down with people as they present their concerns to me - whatever they may be. They usually seek therapy because they’re experiencing some level of emotional distress - and are fundamentally unhappy. I’ve noticed that a number of things come up over and over for people as reasons why this is so. There are certain things they either have - or don’t have - and with this information I’ve been able to come to an understanding of a question posed by many:
What makes people happy?
What do they have that others don’t? What’s their secret?
The following are my 6 secret qualities of happy people, in no particular order:
1) Absence of Toxic Shame: In the book, “Healing the Shame That Binds You,” John Bradshaw describes the difference between healthy vs toxic shame in that, “Healthy shame is an emotion which signals us about our limits…and keeps us grounded,” where “Toxic shame is experienced as the all-pervasive sense that I am flawed and defective as a human being.” Truly happy people have a strong sense of themselves and their value, in other words, an absence of toxic shame. This usually comes from a nurturing, loving and supportive experience in their families of origin. There are many reasons why people struggle with toxic shame. I find it often lies at the core of some depression, anxiety and perfectionism.
2) Absence of Resentment: Really happy people seem to be more successful at forgiveness. In addition, they often haven’t personalized the experience to the degree that others do. When you are good at letting things go - you don’t drag the burden of resentment around with you. Those who hold onto anger or grudges towards others for long periods of time can experience internal emotional distress that leads to bitterness, frustration and often health problems. They can also struggle with depression and excessive anger.
3) Living their Passion: People who are doing work that is satisfying to them, whether they simply enjoy showing up every day - or is more rewarding on a deeper level - tend to be happier. The same applies to those who have found a hobby or cause that brings them joy, whether it’s associated with work or not. Those who dislike their jobs and truly hate getting up every day to go to work tend to have an underlying baseline of life dissatisfaction that can lead to unhappiness. This is particularly true if they’re not engaging in something outside of work that touches that energizing place inside of them - which could atleast partially offset the impact of their unrewarding job.
4) Dreams for the Future: Those who have hopes, plans and excitement for the future are typically happier. They believe they can carry out their dreams - and can actually visualize them coming true. People who struggle with imagining what their futures might hold often don’t really believe that good things could actually happen for them. It’s possible their past or present have been so dismal that they’re unable to project positive things for the future. This is a very common belief of those struggling with depression. They may believe, “I can’t,” or “I don’t deserve.”
5) Ability to Stay in the Moment: Those who have mastered the skill to stay present - or in the moment - tend to be happier. Future worry is common for many people. Those who struggle with anxiety and depression often experience intense worry about about all sorts of things that can or might happen, so much so that the thinking creates an unpleasant emotional experience as if it’s actually occurred!
6) Connections to People: Happy people usually are connected to other people by supportive and loving relationships, no matter whether a few or many. There could be an argument that there are exceptions to this, but by and large, people need other people. From the time we are born, we seek to form attachments to our primary caregivers. Depending on the quality of these attachments, we will usually seek to form friendships and then - intimate partnerships. I’ve found that many unhappy people feel disconnected in some way to others - which can be very painful. Sometimes they are afraid to connect and other times their behavior is disconnecting. Regardless, for those who believe they need other people - and feel alone - a deep sense of unhappiness is common.
Like I mentioned previously, no matter who or where we are in this world, one of the ties that binds us together is the desire for happiness. Many of us know someone who seems to be a truly happy person. There’s something almost magical about them, their level of serenity, joy and state of “knowing” that everything will work out. And if doesn’t, it will still eventually be ok. I imagine that this person likely has all of the 6 happiness qualities I mentioned above. There are so many things that influence our emotional and psychological development. I believe that barring environmental chaos, (war, poverty, living conditions, etc) and severe psychological disturbance, we all have the ability to be “happy.”
It can require a bit of work to tackle the things that might be blocking us from that very achievable goal - shame, resentment, lack of dreams, future worry, isolation and/or lack of a life passion. The great news is I’ve seen it done enough times in my work as a therapist to know - it’s absolutely possible.
by Lisa Brookes Kift, MFT.
If there’s one thing that we all seek - it’s happiness. I’ve never met a person who has told me they didn’t want to be happy, have you? When I do individual therapy, I have the opportunity to sit down with people as they present their concerns to me - whatever they may be. They usually seek therapy because they’re experiencing some level of emotional distress - and are fundamentally unhappy. I’ve noticed that a number of things come up over and over for people as reasons why this is so. There are certain things they either have - or don’t have - and with this information I’ve been able to come to an understanding of a question posed by many:
What makes people happy?
What do they have that others don’t? What’s their secret?
The following are my 6 secret qualities of happy people, in no particular order:
1) Absence of Toxic Shame: In the book, “Healing the Shame That Binds You,” John Bradshaw describes the difference between healthy vs toxic shame in that, “Healthy shame is an emotion which signals us about our limits…and keeps us grounded,” where “Toxic shame is experienced as the all-pervasive sense that I am flawed and defective as a human being.” Truly happy people have a strong sense of themselves and their value, in other words, an absence of toxic shame. This usually comes from a nurturing, loving and supportive experience in their families of origin. There are many reasons why people struggle with toxic shame. I find it often lies at the core of some depression, anxiety and perfectionism.
2) Absence of Resentment: Really happy people seem to be more successful at forgiveness. In addition, they often haven’t personalized the experience to the degree that others do. When you are good at letting things go - you don’t drag the burden of resentment around with you. Those who hold onto anger or grudges towards others for long periods of time can experience internal emotional distress that leads to bitterness, frustration and often health problems. They can also struggle with depression and excessive anger.
3) Living their Passion: People who are doing work that is satisfying to them, whether they simply enjoy showing up every day - or is more rewarding on a deeper level - tend to be happier. The same applies to those who have found a hobby or cause that brings them joy, whether it’s associated with work or not. Those who dislike their jobs and truly hate getting up every day to go to work tend to have an underlying baseline of life dissatisfaction that can lead to unhappiness. This is particularly true if they’re not engaging in something outside of work that touches that energizing place inside of them - which could atleast partially offset the impact of their unrewarding job.
4) Dreams for the Future: Those who have hopes, plans and excitement for the future are typically happier. They believe they can carry out their dreams - and can actually visualize them coming true. People who struggle with imagining what their futures might hold often don’t really believe that good things could actually happen for them. It’s possible their past or present have been so dismal that they’re unable to project positive things for the future. This is a very common belief of those struggling with depression. They may believe, “I can’t,” or “I don’t deserve.”
5) Ability to Stay in the Moment: Those who have mastered the skill to stay present - or in the moment - tend to be happier. Future worry is common for many people. Those who struggle with anxiety and depression often experience intense worry about about all sorts of things that can or might happen, so much so that the thinking creates an unpleasant emotional experience as if it’s actually occurred!
6) Connections to People: Happy people usually are connected to other people by supportive and loving relationships, no matter whether a few or many. There could be an argument that there are exceptions to this, but by and large, people need other people. From the time we are born, we seek to form attachments to our primary caregivers. Depending on the quality of these attachments, we will usually seek to form friendships and then - intimate partnerships. I’ve found that many unhappy people feel disconnected in some way to others - which can be very painful. Sometimes they are afraid to connect and other times their behavior is disconnecting. Regardless, for those who believe they need other people - and feel alone - a deep sense of unhappiness is common.
Like I mentioned previously, no matter who or where we are in this world, one of the ties that binds us together is the desire for happiness. Many of us know someone who seems to be a truly happy person. There’s something almost magical about them, their level of serenity, joy and state of “knowing” that everything will work out. And if doesn’t, it will still eventually be ok. I imagine that this person likely has all of the 6 happiness qualities I mentioned above. There are so many things that influence our emotional and psychological development. I believe that barring environmental chaos, (war, poverty, living conditions, etc) and severe psychological disturbance, we all have the ability to be “happy.”
It can require a bit of work to tackle the things that might be blocking us from that very achievable goal - shame, resentment, lack of dreams, future worry, isolation and/or lack of a life passion. The great news is I’ve seen it done enough times in my work as a therapist to know - it’s absolutely possible.
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Live in the Present...NOW
Living life consciously or deliberately does take effort. Your thoughts are the key. Keeping your mind aware of them is harder than it seems because we are so used to living life unconsciously. We get caught up in work, worrying, thinking about the past, what we have to do in the future so that we lose sight of the NOW. We need to be our own 3rd eye- watching, watching , watching!
Aware of the beauty of what's happening now...smelling the roses. It is worth the effort so we can feel that happiness that only comes from this state of mind.
Aware of the beauty of what's happening now...smelling the roses. It is worth the effort so we can feel that happiness that only comes from this state of mind.
Sunday, May 18, 2008
Recipe 38- Shift into High Gear
We all experience swings in our mood states from time to time- you may feel happy one moment, frustrated another and sad or grumpy at other times depending on what you are focusing on. This is inevitable and some what controllable (unless we are dealing with a mood disorder that needs to be treated by a medical doctor).
Prepare ahead of time to be ready to shift thoughts by making a list of shifters. Write down those thoughts that could quickly change a negative thought and evoke a positive feeling or at least a feeling of relief. Don't expect to go from total frustration to joy instantaneously. But if you can feel a bit of relief of hopefulness, you are on your way.This will start the chain of reaction of attracting more and more positive thoughts.
When a negative thought enters your mind let it go. Say to yourself "I will receive what I choose to think. My feelings will guide me. " Then replace the negative thought with a shifter thought from your list. If one doesn't work, try another. The key is to refocus and feel the good feeling that attaches to it. Try being fully present in the moment and focusing on all those things that support your well-being;look around and be thankful for all the small things.
Prepare ahead of time to be ready to shift thoughts by making a list of shifters. Write down those thoughts that could quickly change a negative thought and evoke a positive feeling or at least a feeling of relief. Don't expect to go from total frustration to joy instantaneously. But if you can feel a bit of relief of hopefulness, you are on your way.This will start the chain of reaction of attracting more and more positive thoughts.
When a negative thought enters your mind let it go. Say to yourself "I will receive what I choose to think. My feelings will guide me. " Then replace the negative thought with a shifter thought from your list. If one doesn't work, try another. The key is to refocus and feel the good feeling that attaches to it. Try being fully present in the moment and focusing on all those things that support your well-being;look around and be thankful for all the small things.
Saturday, May 17, 2008
Permanent Transformation- Practice Makes Perfect
Transforming your life and changing how you live takes practice and work. Too often we read self-help books,really identify with the principles shared and have these wonderful enlightening moments as we realize what is not or what is working in our lives. But then 3 months later these principles become a fading memory.No real change has occurred. Why? Noted psychologist William Glasser tells us how we learn and what we remember. We learn and retain:
10% of what we read
20% of what we hear
30% of what we see
50% of what we see and hear
70% of what we discuss with others
95% of what we teach
What this means for life transformation is that we must apply the principles of the Law of Attraction daily. Focus on them, do them, discuss them, teach them. In short, consciously practice them each day till they become part of your life.You've heard the old adage, practice makes perfect. Well, it's never been truer. That's what Living The Secret Everyday is all about
Taken from: Living The Secret Everyday: My Secret Workbook
10% of what we read
20% of what we hear
30% of what we see
50% of what we see and hear
70% of what we discuss with others
95% of what we teach
What this means for life transformation is that we must apply the principles of the Law of Attraction daily. Focus on them, do them, discuss them, teach them. In short, consciously practice them each day till they become part of your life.You've heard the old adage, practice makes perfect. Well, it's never been truer. That's what Living The Secret Everyday is all about
Taken from: Living The Secret Everyday: My Secret Workbook
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
The Power of Affirmations and the Law of Attraction
" The human mind is constantly attracting vibrations
that harmonize with that which dominates the mind.
Any thought, idea, plan or purpose which one holds
in one's mind attracts a host of its 'relatives' to
its own force and becomes the dominating, motivating
master of the individual in whose mind it has been housed."
-- Napoleon Hill
that harmonize with that which dominates the mind.
Any thought, idea, plan or purpose which one holds
in one's mind attracts a host of its 'relatives' to
its own force and becomes the dominating, motivating
master of the individual in whose mind it has been housed."
-- Napoleon Hill
Friday, April 11, 2008
5 Tips for the Creating a Healthy Home Environment
1.A warm and accepting environment- Give spontaneous hugs and warm feelings frequently for no particular reason. Send the message "I love you" over and over by your words and actions. There can never be too much of this. This is especially important when a child misbehaves- parents must be careful not to withdraw their love. They must demonstrate their love is unconditional by firmly and calmly addressing the behavior they don't approve of and not the child as a person. Optimism is the cornerstone. The glass is half full rather than half empty. Focus on the strenghts of your children (compliment them) rather than their weaknesses. Speak positively about others.
2. Set limits on your child's behavior. What are the rules of the house? What is expected from each member of the family? What are the consequences for breaking the rules? Are these communicated to the children so they know what is expected of them?
3. Promote self esteem. Give approval and attention at every opportunity.Encouragement and kind words motivate children to cooperate and meet challenges head on. When children hear their parents talking positively about them, they feel special. Self esteem is fostered when parents praise them . Any strengths and accomplishments should be recognized. Put-downs, sarcasm and ridicule have no place in the home for raising healthy children. Give children tasks and chores that are a bit challenging but designed so they can be successful. Self confidence increases with each successful experience.
4. Encourage open communication and the expression of feelings. Children learn from watching Mom and Dad that all feelings are okay. They learn that feelings are expressed with words and not acted on. Anger, sadness, joy, jealousy...are accepted and discussed openly. When we inquire about children's feelings and listen carefully, we send a message that they are special to us. Staying calm when children scream, cry or panic makes children feel safe and optimistic that these feelings will go away. Criticizing, denying or blaming children for feeling anxious or upset will only close down communication channels.
5. Model and teach social skills. Children learn to be assertive. Show and teach them early on to ask for what they want, say no and stand up for themselves. Parents should model an effective problem solving approach...and problem solve outloud: state the issue (problem); think about all the posssible solutions, evaluate the solutions; choose the best solution and act on it. Teach children that conflict is a natural part of life and its okay to disagree. Show them that what is important is how they solve the conflict; use their words and not hands; share, take turns etc.
Children learn friendship skills by watching their parents interact with friends. Its important to begin exposing children to other children in play situations so they learn how to get along with others.
2. Set limits on your child's behavior. What are the rules of the house? What is expected from each member of the family? What are the consequences for breaking the rules? Are these communicated to the children so they know what is expected of them?
3. Promote self esteem. Give approval and attention at every opportunity.Encouragement and kind words motivate children to cooperate and meet challenges head on. When children hear their parents talking positively about them, they feel special. Self esteem is fostered when parents praise them . Any strengths and accomplishments should be recognized. Put-downs, sarcasm and ridicule have no place in the home for raising healthy children. Give children tasks and chores that are a bit challenging but designed so they can be successful. Self confidence increases with each successful experience.
4. Encourage open communication and the expression of feelings. Children learn from watching Mom and Dad that all feelings are okay. They learn that feelings are expressed with words and not acted on. Anger, sadness, joy, jealousy...are accepted and discussed openly. When we inquire about children's feelings and listen carefully, we send a message that they are special to us. Staying calm when children scream, cry or panic makes children feel safe and optimistic that these feelings will go away. Criticizing, denying or blaming children for feeling anxious or upset will only close down communication channels.
5. Model and teach social skills. Children learn to be assertive. Show and teach them early on to ask for what they want, say no and stand up for themselves. Parents should model an effective problem solving approach...and problem solve outloud: state the issue (problem); think about all the posssible solutions, evaluate the solutions; choose the best solution and act on it. Teach children that conflict is a natural part of life and its okay to disagree. Show them that what is important is how they solve the conflict; use their words and not hands; share, take turns etc.
Children learn friendship skills by watching their parents interact with friends. Its important to begin exposing children to other children in play situations so they learn how to get along with others.
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